Ruby: A little love and a little pie

As I mentioned in the first BLOG of the year, we want these articles to do a number of things that we had neglected in the past year. One of the areas we wanted to focus on was inspiration and inspirational stories. Ruby’s story is one of those, not because of what Ruby did, but what God did for Ruby. This is a true story…

Ruby had a hard life, by almost any standard. At an early age, in the time of the Great Depression, her father died, leaving her, her mother, and siblings at a time when any family could barely survive with a man in it. Her mother sent Ruby to beg for oil from their equally poor neighbors, so the family could have a little light at night. One of the things her mother did, religiously, was attend church. Ruby’s mother would drag her and her siblings to service after service, many times seven nights a week. Ruby began to resent religion and especially Christianity. Many incidents changed her heart forever, as it left a scar that would linger for the next few decades of her life. It is a repeated story of Christians not living the words they speak, violation of trust and confidence, and tearing innocence from a young girl’s soul. Ruby soon began to build a wall of mistrust and anger that would tear at her very essence.

Ruby found an out to the life she would grow to resent; his name was Cline. Cline was a slick talking, handsome, and debonair guy, “lucky with the ladies” everyone said. To Ruby’s surprise, ‘Cotton’ (as he was known) fancied her and choose her above all the other girls in the community. A whirlwind romance and promises of leaving the life of drudgery and poverty soon manifested into a wedding and Cline and Ruby were married. Ruby was seeking an out for the life she was bound to, and maybe she loved Cline, but her heart still held dark recesses of the pain she felt in the circumstances life dealt her. God brought a sense of joy into her life, as a new life was soon to come. A ‘bundle of joy’ would soon arrive, and Ruby could see a reason to live, a purpose to love, and a glimpse of God’s goodness, though it would be short lived.

Cline WAS lucky with the ladies, and it didn’t stop with his vow before God. Ruby found herself with an infant, a marriage shattered, and another reason to resent God for her circumstances. She sought help from her family in the dire straits she found herself, it would be miniscule and minimal, at best. On top of the child she now had to raise, an archaic, unjust rule/law stated that she had crossed state lines with her baby, and Cline was not obligated to support her or her new baby. Gloria, the precious child she now had, would be the redeeming grace in her young married life, now shattered by divorce and abandonment. Yet God was teaching Ruby lessons, which she could not see then, but would later understand their meaning. Love was all she had. Gloria could not ‘give’ anything back to Ruby, she could only ‘take’. Yet, in the midst of her problems, this one problem gave her hope, purpose, and a will to live. Sadly, her relationship with Cline would color all meaningful relationships with other men, including abusive circumstances. She could not see a good Father, or man for that matter, in the men of her life. Yet, THE FATHER was directing her life in ways later understood.

Ruby could not seek welfare, nor assistance from Gloria’s father. The late 1940’s and early 1950’s saw a radical change for women in the workplace, but this was not an era of child care in the workplace, high paying women’s jobs, or help by agencies dedicated to women. She was on her own (as it seemed to her). The one factor in her life, for the rest of her life, was her love for Gloria. This love would cause her to take any kind of job to survive. This would include jobs men twice her size would crumble under (she may have weighed 90-100 ponds at times). She would do anything to help her child, she loved so dear. God used this, though Ruby would not have admitted then, to teach Ruby about unconditional love. Like nothing else in her life, Gloria was her reason to live, love, and/or hope. Tuberculosis would invade Ruby’s world, confining Gloria to a hospital ward in the 1950’s. Ruby had to leave her precious baby girl in the hospital, as she had to work to survive. This nagged at her for the rest of her life as she struggled from job to job to make ends meet. She would later work in jobs traditionally thought of as ‘men’s work’ and do it better than most men. Ruby’s resentment of God and the circumstances of her life would continue to weigh heavy, even as Gloria gave her two grandsons that Ruby could love and adore as much as her own daughter, but God would use all these things to bring her to His place for her.

Late in her life, Ruby worked in a factory, making automobile parts. She had found good work in the factories, gave Gloria a decent childhood, and survived the turbulent ups and downs of the 1960’s, 70’s, and into the 80’s. She was near retirement age when she meet a young man named Steve. Steve was Ruby’s oldest grandson’s age, and there was an instant bond formed, of some sort. It was a strange paring, the ‘ol’ granny’ and ‘young punk’ as many would have said, but it bloomed into a genuine friendship. God would use Steve in the most unique way. Steve was a baseball fan and loved going to see the Reds play. One particular game Steve was a little tipsy, having consumed a few game beers, and tragically, Steve feel several feet from the stands, leaving him paralyzed and unable to work. Gloria had long moved on with her own life, and Ruby was left with life on her own, this gave Ruby a new purpose, a new task, and a new thing to love, that couldn’t return it in like manner. God would take Steve’s circumstances and teach Ruby lessons in unconditional love, which would be long lasting.

Steve could do very little for himself, especially at first. He needed help getting dressed, getting from one place to another, even needing assistance to get out of bed. Ruby would step into Steve’s life in a way no one could imagine. Twice her size and more than half her age, Steve found himself being ‘packed’ from place to place by Ruby. She would load Steve and his wheelchair into her station wagon and take him places, including favorite fishing spots. She did for Steve a beautiful thing, giving him a reason to live and survive. She encouraged him, cared for him, and, most importantly, never felt sorry for him. Her genuine love for Steve would help lead him to learn to drive, continue his education, and eventually marry. God used this ‘unique’ relationship to show Ruby unconditional love, again. She brought purpose and meaning to Steve’s life as he helped her to struggle to find meaning and purpose, also.

Years of abuse to her lungs, some by factories, much by self-inflicted means (cigarettes), brought emphysema to her life. She had lived many years on her own, after Gloria had married. She could do anything she wanted, when she wanted, and how she wanted. Her self-reliance was an obstacle to God’s plan for her life, and God would use a debilitating disease to bring her to a place of repentance and redemption, in ways she could never had imagined. Life had dealt another blow to Ruby, she was unable to live on her own and Gloria happily opened her home to her mother. Gloria and her family had found Christ and were active in the local church. Gloria’s husband was a minister there as well. Ruby’s resentment of God, church, and all things religious (especially Christianity) would be a constant struggle in her new environment. Ruby felt a strange feeling, one she had never sensed, at least as long as she could remember. This tugging on her soul would be bathed in the kindness of strangers, and ‘church folk’ no less.

In being confined to the length of an oxygen hose, Ruby spent more time ‘cooped-up’ in Gloria’s house. Then the visits started. Ruby rejected all attempts to talking about God, Christ, or her soul, but she welcomed the love that manifested itself in pies, cakes, and friendly visits by these strangers she had just meet. God uses the Gospel to save us, we can be assured of this great truth, but it is presented in many different ‘boxes’. Ruby was soon feeling the love of Christ thru Gloria’s church family and of the Gospel demonstrated in their love towards her and her acceptance of the truths , “So now I am giving you a new commandment: Love each other. Just as I have loved you, you should love each other. 35 Your love for one another will prove to the world that you are my disciples.” (John 13:34-35 -NLT).

She was saved in a time of her life, late, near the end of her days. It was a miracle that the same person who resented the church, God, and Christianity, who also vowed to not darken a church door, now loved dragging her oxygen tank to church to hear her son-in-law preach, something she would dare anyone to suggest before. Her days would be short lived, in her time with Gloria. The disease that ailed her would rob her ability to breath and extinguish the life of her frail, little, skeletal frame. Surrounding her bed, the day of her death, were her son-in-law, the minister, a grandson, who was now a preacher, too, and her precious daughter she showered so much love and devotion upon. They bowed their heads in prayer, as God sent an angel to dispatch her to another realm. The story ends with a woman, a life of struggle, heartaches, and pain, finding a Savior so gracious and loving to bring her into his family and to live with him forever.

Oh, and that’s not the end of the story either. This was about twenty years ago, and the grandson, standing over his grandmother, searching for the words to pray, was me. A twenty-some-year old minister, who watched the love of strangers bring his grandmother into a relationship with Jesus. Looking back now, he sees God’s hands in the midst of his Grandmother Ruby’s life, tumultuous as it was, yet guided by a great hand of sovereignty, grace, and love. This is meant to encourage you to not give up, not give in to doubts. Every pie you bake for a neighbor unware of God’s love is another piece of the ‘pie’ He may use to reveal Himself in a unique way. The truth of that prophetic word, spoken hundreds of years even before Christ, ring so true, as I view my Granny Ruby’s life, (Isaiah 55:8-9 -KJV) “For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, saith the LORD. 9 For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts.”

#inspiration #salvation #Ruby